Some thoughts on 'Coming Out'

I have to ‘Come Out’ a lot….

Whenever I meet people I’ll be spending a fair amount of time with, I quickly make a point of using the phrase 'my boyfriend' in our casual conversation. Each time, I get that same little shiver up my spine. Is it fear? Perhaps not. Nervousness? Maybe so. Embarrassment? YES! But mostly for the other person!   

Like many of you, I’ve been 'Out' so long that I hardly think of myself as such. In fact, I was barely ever 'In' – as it wasn't long after I came to grips with my sexuality that I began telling friends and family. As an adult, I have been able to construct a gay-friendly world in which to live. Every year, it seems less and less often that I’m made to feel uncomfortable because of my sexuality. And, while I may walk around feeling like some sort of gender bending warrior, I also know that many people who see me don't assume I'm gay (unless, of course, they see Me and my Boyfriend buying a delightful selection of teas and jams at the grocery).

So why do I make a point of making sure that people know I'm gay? After all, each time I do, it opens up the horrible possibility of someone telling me they thought I was straight – as if it were a compliment (that never seems to happen when I'm sporting a fauxhawk). I do it for two reasons. First, of course, I'm proud of who I am and I cannot be comfortable unless I’m OUT! Second, being OUT isn't just about personal pride, it's about solidarity.

As people who are healthy, happy and OUT, we serve as role models for others; young and old, who may be struggling with their sexuality. WE reduce the risk for fellow LGBTQ people.  WE reinforce the reality that ANYONE might be gay. WE put faces on the issues that affect us. WE show that gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people are human beings! We flip the bird to the bigots!  If you think about it...that is something to be proud of!

Happy National Coming Out Month!

 By Mike Slaton